As I type this I am feeling extremely lethargic and not exactly motivated to get ready for the two classes I am due to teach this evening. There I said it! I know, I am always happy and positive when you see me. But like anyone else I have my down days. Today being one of them. I feel exhausted (considering the amount I have slept this weekend it’s quite an achievement, I was feeling the start of cold) and on the verge of tears and I can’t pin point why. Actually, I know the cause of the exhaustion. I’ve not been looking after myself.
The last two weeks I’ve had countless trips to the school whilst my youngest mini bee has been settling in to reception on top of resuming 10 classes a week. Combine all of that with too much screen time (both tv & phone) and indulging in cake and chocolate far too often. It’s not exactly a recipe for self-love is it.
But why am I doing it? I know what I should be doing to look after myself but for some reason, I am not. And I am supposed to a be role model…
I’m trying not be too harsh on myself after all, I am human and my youngest mini bee starting school is a major life event. But at the same time, I need to make sure I am OK and in a position to be there for the people that need me.
From the moment I held my first born, my life changed and I remember thinking to myself “it’s not about me anymore” my world had changed forever. I’ve felt that like for over 6 years now, I’m not important. I’ll deal with everyone else first then worry about me.
I’m beginning to learn that that is the wrong approach to have. If I burn myself out looking after everyone else, I’m not good to anyone.
Something must change. Firstly, I need to follow my own advice and shut off screen time 1-2 hours before going to bed and get to bed with enough time for 7-9 hours sleep. This is the hardest thing to do as I when get back from class watching TV with Mr Bee is the only time we get together in the week. Despite letting many things slip, writing a gratitude diary and reading have been consistent. Next, cut down on the chocolate and cake, apart for a few minutes of satisfaction I then feel flabby and my skin looks awful.
I shall then plan some time each week for me whether it’s my own workout (a very rare thing), a beauty treatment (last one was in July) or even just a sit down in a coffee bar with a book. I need to give back to myself. When I do give back to myself, I feel great and ready to get stuff done. I am going to block out some time in my diary just for that.
Could you do with a bit more self love?
If any of this resonates with you, please comment below. I’d love for you to share what you do for yourself…
Until next time
Bee Happy, Bee Healthy, Bee YOU!